Norway is not a banana republic. Norway is a constitutional monarchy. But sometimes one may wonder whether there is much difference. The nepotism, cronyism, the many breaches of impartiality rules and the one-sided, narrative-driven media of Norwegian social democracy are no better than those of countries and regimes with which we do not like to compare ourselves.
An 89-year-old monarch passed away peacefully in his sleep. He was a pleasant and friendly man. I met him myself on a couple of occasions. Fitting as the head of social-democratic Norway, but perhaps too kind as the head of his own family. I am a republican, but dear King Harald: Rest in peace! You tried to follow the spirit of the times and did as you were told.
It is natural for a constitutional monarchy to mark such a transition with solemnity. What is less natural is how the King’s passing was immediately turned into a national career, ideology and excuse-making machine to serve the politically correct narratives.
The King’s passing is being used to garner attention, to advance one’s own opinions, to whitewash dubious royal biographies and to push politically inconvenient matters out of the news.
Even before the coffin lay in the Palace Chapel, there was a queue of notables from Norwegian politics and cultural life waiting to tell us that the King had made them who they are. Støre, Barth Eide, Søreide and Egeland milked it for all it was worth to demonstrate their own excellence. Quite distasteful, if you ask me.
A well-known journalist wrote that the King’s garden-party speech in 2016 «brought me out of the closet». The speech, in which Harald said that Norwegians are «girls who love girls» and that Norwegians have also immigrated from Afghanistan, Pakistan, Somalia and Syria, was dug up again as though multiculturalism and identity politics had become the nation’s new constitution.
NRK and the rest of the narrative-driven media ran the story on loop. The message is simple: The late King was first and foremost a multicultural and queer icon, and anyone who does not understand «the new normal» and mourn in the right way is mourning wrongly.
It is of course legitimate to commemorate a popular king. It is quite another matter when the state broadcaster and the media machine use the funeral to obsessively push the same narrative they always push: that Norway’s greatest strength is immigration, a colourful community and identity politics, and that any objection to this is lacking in solidarity.
The enormous costs associated with non-Western immigration, the failed integration policy, the primitive honour culture, the overuse of social benefits and the overrepresentation in crime statistics are to be forgotten. It would not be fitting. Instead, NRK goes into overdrive and fills its schedule with as many grieving non-Western immigrants as it can get hold of in the Palace Square.
At the same time, attention is deliberately diverted from what has in fact increasingly characterised the Norwegian Royal Family: a dysfunctional family and a king who failed to set boundaries and act as the head of a family, and who failed to safeguard the only function the Norwegian Royal House has left – its symbolic function.
After the lung transplant and the King’s passing, no one talks any longer about the fact that our new Queen, Mette-Marit, had an exceptionally chequered reputation in Kristiansand before she came through Sørlandsporten and all the way to the royal estate at Skaugum. It has become deafeningly quiet about the fact that for years she maintained close contact with Jeffrey Epstein, long after he had been convicted of paying minors for sex.
The Epstein files contain hundreds of references and emails in which she calls him charming and «soft hearted», and show that she stayed at his house in Palm Beach. She googled him in 2011 and wrote that it «didn’t look good» – with a smiley face. She later said that she had been manipulated and did not know.
That is an explanation that requires more than polite silence during the period of mourning. Our new Queen has struggled with her health and received new lungs, but she has contributed to weakening the position of the Royal House and its symbolic function, and thereby Norway’s reputation abroad. Foreign media are feasting on the great elephant, which is now walking down Karl Johan dressed in black.
I do not know whether one outweighs the other, although many evidently think so. Support for the Royal House is back where it was before the Epstein files were published. It is strange how easily influenced people are.
Her son, Marius Borg Høiby, has been sentenced to four years in prison for two rapes and abuse. The judgment has been appealed, he is being held under restrictions, but is granted leave with an electronic ankle tag to attend his grandfather’s funeral. That is fair enough in itself, but again: the symbolic function of the Royal House has been weakened. Sex, drugs and violence are not entirely compatible with how the Royal Family is supposed to conduct itself in a constitutional monarchy. It shows contempt for the people.
Then we have Princess Märtha Louise and her husband Durek Verrett. For years she has used the Royal House and the title of princess to sell angels, spirituality and «healing», contrary to the Constitution and the Royal House’s close connection to the Evangelical Lutheran faith, and contrary to all common sense. You can’t make this shit up! The world is laughing at the Norwegian Royal House.
Durek has stated that women with «too many sexual partners» acquire energetic imprints in the vagina that must be cleansed, and in audio recordings he has said that he helped a woman «cleanse her vagina» after rough sex. He has described touching genitals as healing and sold medallions that are supposed to cure illnesses and «evil eyes» for NOK 2,300 apiece!?
This is not a side issue. It is quite insane. While NRK and VG talk incessantly about inclusion and «the King of all Norway», this is the reality of the Norwegian Royal Family.
And while all this is now going into overdrive, other issues are being buried. On Tuesday, 1 September, in the midst of the period of mourning, petrol and diesel prices shot through the roof when the temporary tax cuts expired. I came from Sweden and bought diesel in Särna for NOK 18.45 per litre. In Elverum, just across the border in oil-producing Norway, it cost NOK 28.75. How is that possible? But preferably we are not to talk about it, because our politicians have said that the country is in mourning and that we must keep the period of mourning sacred.
At the same time, the war in Ukraine continues unabated. Norway sends billions to keep it going. Russia conducts intelligence and hybrid activities against us. The Armed Forces are in a state of disrepair, and emergency preparedness, air-raid shelters and civil defence are lacking, or are in a deplorable state, while critical military and civilian infrastructure lies unprotected. Nor are we supposed to talk about that.
The same applies to the ideological madness that has characterised schools, cultural institutions and public administration for years: gender ideology, language control, Pride flags and the perpetual pursuit of «inclusive» symbolic politics. King Harald’s inclusive speeches are now used as the final word: We have already solved it. We are not talking about that any more. Next item.
A Royal House that is supposed to unite the nation cannot simultaneously be a shield for scandals and a megaphone for one particular political line of which large parts of the population are strongly critical. It cannot neglect the only function it still has left: its symbolic function. It cannot contribute to dragging the country through the mud.
When the media choose to tell the story of the warm, diverse King while the Epstein emails, rape convictions, the angel industry and the shamanistic genital therapy are left alone, that is not neutral journalism. It is a diversionary manoeuvre and propaganda designed to accustom us to the new normal.
Norway is a country where morality, common sense and right and wrong are beginning to disintegrate. It is a country with a Royal House that has failed in its only remaining function, as an elevated and unifying symbol for a people, a nation and a furrowed and weather-beaten land that has grown out of the toil and struggle of our forefathers and foremothers (!). That demands respect from the Royal House if Norway is still to have a constitutional monarchy.
And if Norway is still to be a democracy, ceremony cannot become more important than substance, the elite cannot be protected by tone, the media cannot act as pure propaganda machines, and freedom of expression cannot be reserved for the servile, the adaptable and the true believers. Ordinary people’s safety, petrol bills and common sense must not come second. That is far more important than watching Mette-Marit, Märtha, Marius and Durek wave to NRK from the palace balcony.
King Haakon has chosen «All for Norway» as his motto. It is a wise choice. But it carries obligations. It is something quite different from the prevailing narrative of «Norway for everyone». Haakon’s previous statements that the motto is «extremely banal» and «somewhat selfish» may, for the time being, be forgotten.
King Harald is dead. It is cruel to say it, but he died at an exceptionally convenient time. But he shall be allowed to rest in peace. The narratives, however, are still very much alive and well. They cannot be allowed to rest!
It will therefore be interesting to see whether King Haakon manages to live up to his motto better than his predecessor. If he does, we shall gladly turn a blind eye to his wife’s dubious past, his sister’s belief in angels, Marius’ escapades (if he receives the sentence he deserves) and perhaps even Durek’s vaginal therapy.
All for Norway!
