Adapt — or disappear. That is the message the Church of Sweden is sending to priests who hold to the classical Christian understanding of marriage. At the same time as the church officially condemns conversion therapy, pastoral counseling, therapy, and targeted conversations are being recommended in order to change priests’ theological convictions.
But the preferential treatment of homosexuality is nothing new.
In 2009, the Church Assembly — the Church of Sweden’s highest decision-making body — decided that same-sex couples should have the right to be married within the Church of Sweden. At the same time, individual priests were guaranteed a so-called right of reservation, meaning that a priest who, based on theological conviction, believed marriage to be reserved for a man and a woman, would not be forced to officiate same-sex weddings.
The decision was presented as an expression of diversity, inclusion, and acceptance: church weddings were opened to same-sex couples while priests retained the right to hold to classical Christian faith.
Not even twenty years later, that era already appears to be over.
Now, according to the Swedish bishops, every future priest must “joyfully and willingly” officiate weddings for same-sex couples. This demand from the bishops has emerged under strong pressure from the Social Democrats, who, true to form, have spent the years since 2009 gradually tightening the ideological screws.
According to the Social Democrats, it is not enough for future priests simply to officiate same-sex weddings — all priests who refuse to do so should be dismissed. This despite the fact that there is already a shortage of priests, and even when the priest in question is both competent and highly sought after
How absurd this actually is becomes clear when one looks more closely at what it means in practice.
The Dictatorship of the Minority
Last year, 12,135 couples were married in the Church of Sweden. Of these, less than one percent were same-sex couples. This small percentage also has something the remaining 99 percent often lack: a clear preference regarding which priest they want to officiate their wedding. Same-sex couples usually know which priests are active within LGBTQ circles, and these are the priests they request.
In practice, this means that a very small proportion of priests officiate a very large share of same-sex weddings.
For many priests, officiating same-sex weddings is also viewed as a career advantage, and it is well known that priests who become visible and popular in these contexts improve their chances of advancement.
Already today, a priest’s position on same-sex marriage is virtually a mandatory question in job interviews, and answering affirmatively is a prerequisite for employment.
This is the dictatorship of the minority — skilled priests are being rejected because they prioritize the Bible and the understanding of marriage that has belonged to the Christian church for nearly two thousand years, rather than left-wing political ideology.
Mandatory Weddings — But Only for Same-Sex Couples
Despite this, the Social Democrats, the media, and the bishops portray the situation as though same-sex couples struggle to get married within the Church of Sweden. That is simply not true. Every same-sex couple seeking a church wedding according to the Church of Sweden’s rites has their request fulfilled. Even though an individual priest still — to the frustration of LGBTQ activists — has the right to decline on theological grounds, every parish rector is obligated to ensure that the couple is married.
No such guarantee exists for any other couples.
Priests have the right to officiate weddings, not the obligation to do so. Part of this right is also the duty to refuse to officiate if the priest believes the marriage is being entered into under coercion or if there are other serious concerns. Under the new rules, a priest would be allowed to refuse any wedding — except same-sex weddings.
Let me give a concrete example: A man in his sixties arrives for a premarital meeting together with an 18-year-old woman. It turns out that the woman recently arrived in Sweden from another country, where the man met her during a vacation and promised her a wonderful future in the blessed West. During the conversation, the woman appears frightened and cries, and because of the language barrier she cannot communicate directly with the priest. Meanwhile, the man behaves in a domineering and demeaning manner toward her and makes statements the priest finds deeply troubling. The priest therefore concludes that the marriage may be coercive and is obligated to refuse to perform the wedding.
But if the older man instead arrives with an 18-year-old man, the priest would not be allowed to refuse the ceremony — doing so would be considered homophobia and a violation of the bishops’ (read: the Social Democrats’) new rules.
Conversion Therapy for Christian Priests
So how are the bishops supposed to create this “joyful and willing” attitude toward same-sex weddings among priests who still insist on holding to Christian faith?
In Vägar framåt – om vigsel och samkönade relationer (Paths Forward — On Marriage and Same-Sex Relationships), the bishops write that they are “working with measures” to achieve this goal:
“All bishops in the Church of Sweden are actively working with various measures to ensure that all future priests joyfully and willingly officiate weddings for both same-sex and opposite-sex couples, for example through placements in parishes with active LGBTQ+ ministries, targeted courses or conversations with mentors, pastoral counseling or therapy focusing on gender roles, sexuality, and human relationships, studies focused on biblical interpretation and the Lutheran understanding of marriage — or rejection from admission.”
Pastoral counseling, therapy, and targeted courses and conversations intended to make priest candidates “think correctly”, in other words. And if the conversion therapy does not work, the candidate is to be denied ordination.
The absurdity here is that the bishops are effectively recommending a form of conversion therapy in order to make priests affirm same-sex relationships and marriage, while the Church Assembly in 2022 decided that the Church of Sweden should reject “all forms of activity aimed at curing or reprogramming sexual orientation or gender identity”.
The conclusion, then, is that a priest may be subjected to conversion therapy in order to become affirming of homosexuality, while simultaneously being forbidden to pray for — or together with — a homosexual person who seeks prayer to leave homosexuality behind.
The Preferential Treatment Is Nothing New
What we are witnessing is therefore nothing less than the idealization and preferential treatment of same-sex relationships, alongside a rejection of the classical Christian faith still upheld by the overwhelming majority of Christian denominations worldwide.
And yet none of this is surprising.
When I studied at the Pastoral Institute in Uppsala before my ordination in 2005, we were taught the following during pastoral counseling classes: If Karin, during a counseling session, explained that she had been married to Nils for ten years but had fallen in love with her colleague Anders and was considering divorce, we as priests were to explain that crises in marriage are normal and that temporary attractions should be resisted. Marriage is worth fighting for, and we should therefore recommend counseling and therapy.
But if Karin instead said she had fallen in love with her colleague Lisa and was considering divorce, an entirely different approach was recommended. Then we as priests were expected to affirm and support Karin in her newly discovered homosexuality. In that case, it became important to encourage Karin to leave Nils and pursue a same-sex relationship.
No, I am not making this up. This was already being taught before the Church of Sweden approved same-sex marriage.
One Hundred Years of Social Democracy: The (S)wedish Church
The question most people naturally ask is how it is even possible for a church claiming to be Christian to make the exclusion of priests with a traditional view of marriage an explicit goal.
The answer is simple: one hundred years of social democracy.
Ever since the Social Democrats in the 1920s decided to reshape the Church of Sweden according to their own political vision, the church has gradually been transformed from a Christian church into a social democratic interest organization and megaphone for party-approved messaging.
With only months remaining before the next national election, it is therefore politically important to convince Swedes once again that the Church of Sweden is a breeding ground for right-wing, homophobic intolerance — and that voting Social Democrat means voting for goodness, tolerance, and inclusion.
That this “tolerance” and “inclusion” are to be achieved through intolerance and exclusion is something they prefer not to discuss.
The reality is that the Church of Sweden’s 3,200 priests may soon face a stark choice if the Social Democrats in the Church Assembly get their way: yes or no to same-sex marriage. A choice that simultaneously becomes yes or no to continued employment.
For all priests who, like myself, believe marriage is a covenant between a man and a woman, the choice will therefore be between lying in order to keep one’s position and salary — or telling the truth and losing one’s livelihood and the means of supporting one’s family.
— We are to be a church where every couple seeking marriage is met with joy and respect, says Archbishop Martin Modéus.
— That is why we bishops continue working so that all future priests will officiate weddings for both same-sex and opposite-sex couples. This is our common order and our common future.
The question the archbishop ought to ask himself is whether any couple — heterosexual or homosexual — truly wants to be married by a priest whose “joy and respect” have been forced upon him or her. How, in practical terms, are they planning to rid the church of priests with the “wrong” values? And what kind of “common future” emerges when unity is achieved by excluding everyone unwilling to submit to the ideology currently dictated by politics?
So many questions — and so few answers. Meanwhile, the Church of Sweden continues drifting like a rudderless ship in stormy seas, with the rocks drawing ever closer.